Reflections on Love and Consciousness

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Reflections on Love and Consciousness

“In a love relation, as Jung once put it, you risk everything. You put yourself on a table, you stop the power game and the trying to dominate or conquer the other person. If you succeed in really loving the other person, if you really relate, then all sorts of miracles happen. But in the beginning stages a general state of blindness possesses you, illusions or wrong expectations, disappointments, recriminations. You have to work through all that first. And that’s how you become more conscious. I didn’t say it is agreeable. So if you don’t love the other, you run away after a while.”
–Marie-Louise von Franz, Récréation: The Wonderful Story of Wolfgang Pauli, C.G. Jung and “the” Woman

Love, as von Franz eloquently describes, is an act of profound surrender. It invites us to step away from the desire to control and instead embrace vulnerability with courage. This is where love transforms—when we lay bare our authentic selves without playing the games of dominance, we create space for true connection, and miracles become possible.

However, the path is neither smooth nor easy. In the early stages, illusions cloud our perceptions, leading to unmet expectations and inevitable disappointments. These are the moments when many choose to walk away, believing love has failed. But von Franz offers a deeper truth: love demands patience and inner work. It is only by navigating these challenges that we grow into a more conscious, evolved version of ourselves.

Real love, therefore, is not without struggle, but it is this struggle that brings meaning. And if love is absent, or if the discomfort of it feels too overwhelming, we may run, seeking refuge in familiar patterns of solitude. Yet, those who persevere through love’s trials emerge enriched, with a clearer sense of self and a deeper connection to the world around them.

Venkataramanan Ramasethu 
Kolkata
20th October 2024

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